Say goodbye to that creepy goatee, Angelina! A month after trimming that homeless man chic beard for the upcoming movie Moneyball, Brad Pitt was spotted yesterday in Los Angeles with no facial hair. At last!

I have a well-documented love/hate relationship with Gwyneth Paltrow. The Iron Man 2 actress is the quintessential icy blonde. Too perfect to live, yet alive and blogging about how she can “do ridiculous things like be a 37-year-old mother of two and wear shorts.” Wow, so crazy of you, you old bag! When I think of G-dog’s hair, I immediately think of the immaculate mid-length blonde… But do you remember her Brad Pitt-era pixie? The brunette phase of the late ‘90s? The braided updo that was a big freakin’ deal at the 2002 Oscar Awards? Ah, memories. Let’s take a look back at Gwynie’s hits and misses. You be the judge which is which.

Gwyneth is an extraterrestrial a blonde through-and-through. But in 1999, she was briefly a mere mortal.

I’m so use to seeing Gwyneth with that just-past-her-shoulders length on the far right, but she wore a short style in ’97 and a super looong look in ‘07. Which is your fav?

Gwyneth wore her hair super straight, wavy, and curly–all in 2009. (While simultaniuously contracting her abdomen muscles + silently judging you.)

Gwyn looks like the lost Spice Girl with this high ponytail in ‘99 and a more elegant in a pony with volume in ‘04.

There is the Oscar dress of shame from 2002, a super cute bun from ‘06, and a chic French twist from ‘08.

For more of Gwyneth Paltrow’s Hairstyles and to vote for your favorites, go to Elle.com.

In 2009, extensions got out of control. As did Lindsay Lohan. This was early in the year, though, when Linds was still looking pretty good. Things got worse…

Drugs ‘r Bad.

Yes, Madonna is an icon and gets to do what she wants. Up to a point. This is that point.

In 2009, Malibu Barbie Denise Richards was still stuck in the ’80s.

Renee Zellweger hit the red carpet at the 2009 Golden Globes looking like… this.

Some gossip about Renee and about a million more bad celebrity hairstyles, after the break!

By the way, I forgot to mentions this, but when I saw Kathy Griffin perform over Thanksgiving, she talked about running into Renee in Las Vegas, and she basically said Renee was totally coked up. I kinda believe her, because Renee had to be high to agree to this dress and hairstyle.

Rumer Willis brought us many new and horrifying hair styles in 2009. This permed, red atrocity was the one that made me the most sad inside, though.

I’m sure this is for a role, but still. Crush killing hair, Orlando Bloom.

Golden Tongue Ring ‘09. Never forget.

Drew Barrymore was a repeat offender in 2009. The skunk look is a “don’t”.

Brad Pitt gets a mention here, thanks to his super gnarly goatee. Which you know he is growing just to annoy Saint Angelina.

Mischa Barton makes the list because… Well, check out those extensions. Did she find them under her bed? ‘Nough said.

Ashlee Simpson went back to bottle black from the fire-engine red she had most of 2009. She makes the Worst Hair list because I hate the dull, flat black color.

Good to know that can can have all the money in the world, access to the very best hair stylist and hair products, and still look like a poodle died on your head. Mary-Kate Olsen: Teaching us important life lessons one style choice at a time.

Looks like Leighton Meester is all ready for Halloween, right? She’s dressed as, um, a brain-injured discoqueen who fell asleep in her leggings when she had her period? Nope! She’s just ready for her musical performance! Man, I hope we look back on ‘09 and say, Leighton Meester? Musical performance?

Sorry, you guys. I had to put this one in here. Kate Gosselin’s hair was the worst hair we had to endure in ‘09. I mean, seriously. We practically needed group therapy to cope. Oh, wait, that’s why I have this blog… Well, better luck next year, reverse mullet!

So, do you guys agree or disagree with my Worst Hair of 2009 picks? Did I miss anyone?

P.S. I will be doing Best Hair of 2009 soon!  ;)

Not that I would ever read gossip magazines or anything, but theoretically if I was classless enough, I would totally skip the articles on Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. They manage to bore the pants off me with their astounding beauty, world peace initiatives, and flock of adorable children. Like: ZZZZZZ…. Wake me when Bad Girls Club Season 4 starts.

Speaking of which, I was in the middle of watching The Jersey Shore last night when the power went out. Do you think god was trying to tell me to stop watching so much crap reality TV?

Doubtful. I digress. My point was to ask if anyone knows what the dealo is with Brad Pitt’s goatee.

I like Saint Angelina’s super tolerant face in this pic. I can tell she’s practicing a very advanced meditation technique before our very eyes. She does not see the goatee. The goatee does not exist. She is one with the absence of the goatee… Om.

And if Maddox is into living in the now, maybe he could get Daddy this for the holidays?

In honor of Movember, the mustache-growing charity event held during November each year that raises funds and awareness for men’s health, Details presents this helpful guide to growing your own:

How To Grow It
If you’re clean shaven, you’ll mostly likely need the entire month to grow your facial hair to the right length—about two inches. Damon Zilly, owner of Fred’s Barber Shop in Los Angeles, suggests keeping the stubble from getting itchy as it grows by washing it daily with a mild soap like Cetaphil or Zirh Wash. Then, before you leave for work, tame any rogue strands by smoothing on a pinhead-size amount of beard wax like Clubman Moustache Wax (regular hair pomade works too).

Other Tips
As the hair on your upper lip becomes thicker, you will need to trim it into shape with a small pair of scissors. The best way to do this is to ask your hair stylist or barber to help shape it for you. Then tend to it daily by keeping it trimmed and combed.

When did Angelina Jolie’s hair get so light? At husband Brad Pitt’s Inglourious Basterds premiere in Los Angeles, Angelina showed up looking lighter brown to me.

Actually, she looks “bronde”! (Blonde + brown.) Which is suppose to be the new color for fall, so… I guess she’s on point.

What do you guys think? Do you like it?